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Pages: Looking for advice [1]
Author Topic: Looking for advice
debose

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Posts: 50

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2015-06-03 17-53-27

Looking for advice I have had a remarkably surprising situation arise for which I need some input from those with some experience. First a little background: We are a relatively older couple (x/x), together x years, and my partner has always been the sort of woman who keeps a deathgrip around the neck of everything with which she comes in contact. "Control freak" would be a mild description :). So yesterday we're just talking, and she mentions how she'd like to learn to not have to control everything all the time, how exhausting it can be, and a people seeking date website goes off in my head and I slowly begin to describe a sexual D/s relationship to her (I read a LOT), and how some people who are always in full control like to surrender that control to someone they trust in the right sexual context, and how they find that to be extremely liberating. I stress that it's not usually a lifestyle choice, just a form of consensual play and temporary power exchange. Then I hold my breath. She says "I'd like to try that. Having someone else be in full control would be interesting." people seeking date websites crap! I tried to not grin from ear to ear as I slowly nodded and said "Well, OK." Now for the problem: she has a degenerative disease which includes muscle and joint pain, and so she cannot stay in anyposition for very long (x minutes at best) before she has to shift her weight around. This makes things like even mild bondage difficult. And I'd like to get into this slowly (don't want to scare her away from the concept). Also, once fully aroused, she likes a little pain, but I have to be very careful there because the sexual pain cannot intersect with her degenerative muscle and joint pain, or the moment is lost. I have had a couple of short-lived D/s experiences before where I stumbled around like a people seeking dating a divorced man boy without knowing what I was doing (still loved every second of it, though), but I'd like to get this right. So I'm looking for advice on how to get things going slowly enough to entice and encourage the concept, but with sufficient control that she truly feels powerless. A tall order, I know. This is MUCH longer than most posts here, but I felt that a proper description of the issue would be more likely to generate appropriate advice. Thanks, kinksters!
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ninetta

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2015-06-13 6-58-34-

How is she about hair pulling? What about pussy pain? Spanking?
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  • stoeckle

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    2015-06-21 10-57-39

    What about a flogger? It tends to be a lot more surface people seeking dating a friend .
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  • benge

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    2015-07-20 22-58-59

    Great idea I think I'd have to work my way up to that sort of "prop", though. It's a bit scary looking for a true rookie :). But yes, surface people seeking dating a man sounds like it might work well. I'll have to think some more along those lines...
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    lenart

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    2015-08-25 17-34-35

    How about wax play and ice play?
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    2015-09-21 3-45-41-

    Excellent idea I am given to understand that some forms of wax burn WAY too hot for wax play. Can someone suggest the type of wax that should be used? I don't want to burn her...
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    ferrigno

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    2015-10-17 21-56-20

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  • peregrine

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    2015-12-05 6-18-51-

    Go to the dollar store and get the white wax people seeking dating a single mom candles. The scenes peel off easily, and they are a low people seeking dating activities temp. Start high up and slowly lower the candle as you get a feel for how hot it is. Keep several candles burning to have a steady supply of wax. Pouring the wax can also put the candle out, so keep a long lighter with you, as well as cool water/ice for emergencies. Here is a good link. people seeking dating ad advice Thanks. As long as the scenes peel off easily. I don't think the people seeking dating ad network people seeking dating ads would be conducive to the mood at the moment :). Perhaps that involves a different sort of kink :).
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    muth

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    2015-12-23 20-24-46

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